
Is it worth the wait?
The Atlantic: Women should settle instead of staying single
Lori Gottlieb has some advice for women: Get married. Now. Before it's too late. And if you have to settle instead of finding the man of your dreams -- well, settle already!
Gottlieb's essay in The Atlantic has stirred up a hornet's nest of passion. Should women settle rather than staying single?















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Staying single
Submitted on February 11th, 2008 by JoelI didn't get married until I was 33. Like Rod Dreher, in Ben's take up there, I didn't settle either.
There was a lot of pressure for me to settle at times during the years. And truth is: I was an awful bachelor. It was no fun for me at all; I was miserable. There were times when I looked back at failed relationships and wondered if I shouldn't have settled for them.
Yet until I met the woman who became my wife, there wasn't anybody worth that kind of effort.
So on some kind of intellectual level, I do sometimes think that people should settle -- if "settling" means accepting reality instead of holding out for some fake Hollywood version of what love is supposed to be. Because that doesn't exist.
But if "settling" means you end up with somebody who doesn't treat you as well as they should -- and often, that's what it means -- then forget it. The Atlantic article takes on political overtones because it's stirred such anger (justifiably) among feminists; but the heart is not a political place.